Sacramento, CA - The state of California announced today that it has successfully solved the homeless crisis within it’s borders. The state has officially passed legislation to designate tents as houses, thus eliminating 98% of it’s homeless population. House Speaker Pelosi praised the new legislation saying “It is a beautiful day here in the great state of California. Once again we have led the nation on an issue of national importance, becoming the first state in the nation to solve the homeless crisis. California leads this nation in so many forward thinking ideas.”

The US Postmaster General was not so enthusiastic about the new designation, wondering how mail would be delivered properly. Pelosi dismissed the pessimistic view stating that “All of the answers are in the legislation. We just had to pass it to know what was in it and how it will work. This is what makes government so great!”

The legislation goes into effect immediately, and should also help California earn additional legislative seats due to the increased Census counts in 2020. Additional legislation is expected to pass today that will hand out free tents to the homeless who do not currently have them.